


How a Padfoot Woo'd a Moony

by orphan_account



Series: Tumblr Trash [2]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe- non magic, Blind Character, Dirty Talk, Fluff, M/M, PWP, Porn Without Plot, Students, University Students, blind!Remus, tumblr trash
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-07
Updated: 2015-10-07
Packaged: 2018-04-25 08:07:33
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,532
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4952824
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He pulled out his laptop and found the post and reblogged it, tagging it for his selfie and adding the caption, “Tumblr Trash Romance Novel: How a Padfoot Woo’d a Moony.”</p><p>“We are disgusting,” Sirius said.  “Like so disgusting.  Like I want to vomit all over your computer.”  He eyed the selfie with Remus’ unbidden and happy smile, and his shut eyes and lips puckered all over Remus’ cheek.  “God, I can’t stand it.  We need to break up right now immediately because I can’t survive this.”</p><p>“I always knew I was fatal,” Remus said from behind a sigh.  He pulled Sirius down.  “Sorry, love.  But there’s no cure.  You’re stuck forever.”</p>
            </blockquote>





	How a Padfoot Woo'd a Moony

**Author's Note:**

> A sequel to The Best By Far Is You. I haven't done anything like super PwP before so I thought I'd just go for it. Literally it's just shagging with witty banter between these two trashcans. But I thought it was only fair because they didn't get a good shag in the first one and they deserved it.

“…but it was easy enough for Paul who had not only his Roman citizenship to stand on, but also a charismatic charm he’d cultivated spent by years on the road as a salesman. It was only by his ever-growing obsession with both the strange culture who worshiped only one god, and the stark contrast of the Pagans he’d grown up knowing that he…” Sirius stopped after he saw Remus draw his tongue along his bottom lip for the fifteenth time in the last four minutes. “…that he chose to throw down his mission, strip off his robes, and shag stupid his loving and wanton companion.”

There was a too-long pause before Remus reacted. “Wait. What?”

Sirius slammed the book closed. “You’re not even listening you sorry excuse for a swot.”

Remus’ cheeks flushed and he sat back in his chair. He’d been deliberately keeping away from the bed, away from Sirius in specific since they’d now had several long snogs and half a shag, but Sirius still had a job to do. And listening to his voice now that Remus knew what Sirius sounded like when his cock was being touched, was altogether distracting.

“I’m going to grab you by your shirt and yank you to the bed. Consider yourself warned.” Then Sirius made good on that promise, his fingers curling into Remus’ ridiculous jumper. Remus let out a yelp as he was bodily pulled onto the mattress, turned round onto his back, and a heavy presence hovered just inches above him. “Now I’m going to kiss you.”

“Is that a warning as well?”

“A promise. A promise that any time I’m ever this close…” Sirius trailed off as Remus’ hand lifted to inspect the distance between them with gentle fingers to Sirius’ cheek, “…I’m going to kiss you. Always.”

“Oh. Well. Get on with it, then, Sirius.”

“Have I ever told you how much I love hearing my name in your stupid brogue?”

“I thought this was about kissing.”

Sirius was shut up after that as his lips were now occupied with soft, pliant ones that were not only kissing back, but making the most delicious noises that went straight to his middle. His stomach felt squirmy like he’d eaten ten jars of jam and nothing else.

“Oh. That’s…” Remus was breathy and handsy as Sirius’ fingers travelled from cheeks down to the hem of his jumper which he wrenched up to play with the warm skin of Remus’ belly. “Oh.”

“Oh. So eloquent.”

“Shut up,” Remus breathed.

“Will do, Moons.” He made better work of his mouth by dragging it open and wet along the underside of Remus’ chin, down to the soft spot where his neck met shoulders, and he nibbled just a bit. “Though I don’t have to shut up if you want. I can just make…other noises.”

Remus laughed a little as his fingers ghosted over the logo of Sirius’ band shirt—he hadn’t asked about it today, was more concerned with what was under it—and then toyed with the button on his jeans. “Not that I’m the best judge, but I’m willing to bet you look better with these off.”

Sirius sucked in a breath through his teeth as Remus’ very talented fingers popped the button, worked the zip down, then crept round the warmth tucked behind the rough material. His boxers were tented with his heavy erection, and he couldn’t help but groan against Remus’ neck.

“That’s…” Sirius gasped again as hot fingers met his naked cock, “oh that’s…very lovely. And a very—ah—a very astute observation for a blind man. Christ Moony, more.” He bucked hard into those fingers. “No wait…ah. Wait. I’ll…too soon.”

Remus carefully removed his hand, drawing it up under the shirt and pinched at Sirius’ nipples. “So how should we delay you, then, hmm? Practice a bit of patience?”

Sirius smiled against Remus’ neck, kissing him there gently, then pulled away. “Maybe get you a little more naked? This jumper’s all in my way, you see.”

“I do not see.”

Sirius’ cheeks went flush. “Blind jokes? At a time like this?”

Remus shrugged up one shoulder, but didn’t protest as Sirius worked the jumper up high, over his head, and it tumbled to the side of the bed in a heap. “You’d better tidy up before I start trying to walk round.”

“Yes, but tripping lands you flat on your back where I can do dirty things to you.”

“Don’t need a concussion to let you do dirty things to me,” Remus breathed. "In fact, I prefer to be clear-headed so I can reciprocate properly." He licked a long stripe just under Sirius' jaw.

Sirius felt his entire body heat up, but was distracted when Remus sat half-way up and began to work Sirius’ shirt up and off. His hands trailed all round his front, over his nipples, down the thatch of dark hair near the waistband of his jeans to inspect his handiwork.

“Lovely like this. Fit and burning hot.” Remus sank his nails into the skin just a bit. “Never minded fucking women much, but this,” he sank his hand lower and trailed his fingers through the coarse hair just round Sirius’ cock, “there’s something very nice and very special about this.”

“Hope you’re talking about just mine,” Sirius growled, arching into Remus’ hands a bit.

Remus chuckled. “Oh, of course, great Padfoot. What sort of man would I be if I was talking about anyone else?”

“The worst sort. The sort I’d need to pin down and shag silly so he’d always remember it’s always and forever me.” He gave Remus a possessive and hard kiss, smiling when Remus moaned directly into his mouth.

They went on like that for a while, eventually wriggling their way out of jeans and trousers and boxers and pants until they were under the sheet, the duvet kicked to the bottom of the bed because it was too bloody hot for it. And they brushed against each other, careful to avoid too much friction whilst getting just enough.

“More,” Remus said after a moment. “I want you.”

Sirius groaned deep in his chest as he pressed his hard cock against Remus’ thigh. “God. I want you so fucking much, Moony. So much I ache.”

“Yeah. You want me? You want to bury yourself inside me.”

Sirius gave a whole body shudder. “Ah. Fuck, you can’t…god I’m going to fucking come like a sixteen year old boy having a wet dream if you’re not careful.”

“When you’re a nineteen year old with way more self-control?” Remus challenged.

“Oh my god shut your stupid mouth,” Sirius said, then shut it for him with teeth and tongue. “And I’m twenty, if you please.”

“Ah twenty, cannae forget how much more mature you are at twenty.” Remus was smiling wolfishly, his eyes sightless but heated and half-lidded, focused somewhere to Sirius’ right. His fingers went up and touched the corner of Sirius’ mouth before a tongue darted out to take a taste of them. “I do though. I want you in me.”

“Have you got anything?”

Remus rolled to the right, careful not to lose too much contact. His hands rummaged round his bedtable drawer and finally came out with a box of condoms and a sample packet of lube stuck to the side with a bit of gummy glue.

“This work?”

“Should be enough.” Sirius felt the anticipation running through him like a fucking freight train and his fingers trembled as he tried to pry the lube from the side of the box. “Ruddy…stupid fucking…”

Remus laughed with his whole body and Sirius hated him a little for being so fucking steady. But it worked out for both of them because Remus got the lube detached and open, and a dollop smeared across Sirius’ index finger.

“Ah Padfoot, where would you be without me?”

“Up the fucking creek, wanking alone in the shower, pining away for a man I didn’t know existed. Sounds like a real tragedy.”

“Weren’t we going to write our own?” Remus asked shifting so Sirius could draw his finger along his crack. “Ah…ah fuck. Yes. Weren’t we going to—oh god—do something…oh.”

Sirius was circling Remus’ hole, then carefully dipped his finger in to the first knuckle. “Not so clever with your words are you now, Messer Moony?”

“Fuck off,” Remus said, but pushed back hard against Sirius’ finger, eliciting a groan from the shorter man. “Deeper. Come on.”

Sirius complied, now so deep he could press his palm against Remus’ arse, and he wriggled his finger a bit, pulling in and out. “Like that? Hmm?”

“God. Oh.”

“Look at you, all red and breathy, and all for me.” Sirius crooked his finger when he found the spot and appreciated the stream of curses and sighs that it drew from his now lover. “You’re fucking beautiful.” He took that pause to slip in a second finger, squirting a bit more of the lube, and ignoring his begging, aching cock.

Remus sucked in breath, letting himself adjust. He braced himself on Sirius’ shoulders, letting his forehead fall against Sirius’ hot skin. “Oh. God. Why does it felt like you were just always meant to be right here?”

“Right here? Fingers in your arse?” Sirius crooked his fingers again and felt Remus’ entire body begin to shake. He scissored his fingers open and moved them back and forth. “Maybe I was. Maybe it was always me.”

“We sound mad,” Remus breathed, unable to help himself from grinding down hard against Sirius’ hand. “Jesus Christ.”

“My name is Sirius Black. How many demi-gods are you fucking that you forget?”

Remus’ eyes opened and he pulled back and tried to glare, but had never really been good at it. “I’m ready. Fuck me, Sirius.”

Sirius now was all nerves because this was it. He had the condom, and his hands were shaking as he rolled it on and he put on so much lube it dripped. He saw Remus’ grin, pinched and just as anxious as his own.

“I heard that. Did you use the whole bottle?”

“Saved a bit,” Sirius said, his face red. “In case.”

Remus almost laughed, but it was cut short by a thick cock pressed against his hole. “Oh.”

“Indeed,” Sirius muttered, then pushed inside.

The whole process was so slow it was near agony. But it was their first time and it had been a long while for each of them and the last person Remus buggered was a woman so it had been twice as long for his own arse. But Sirius was determined to do it right and by god he wouldn’t give up.

It took a good five minutes before he was in, hovering over Remus with his arms shaking as he held himself up. Remus’ legs were up, hooked round his hips, and he was pushing back gently. His eyes were shut, mouth half-open as he adjusted and waited, and, “Oh god right there oh,” he babbled because Sirius had found that spot.

So he moved. Slightly, but he was slippery and wet and covered with latex and he’d found the angle without even trying. Glancing down, he could see Remus’ cock all purple and swollen and weeping against his belly and he wished he was flexible enough to bend down and lick it all up.

“Sirius…oh. Sirius.” Remus’ fingers were digging into his shoulders as Sirius found a rhythm and he pushed in and out, harder, his fingers clutched hard against the sheets because he wanted this so fucking bad now and oh… “Oh,” Remus said, like a surprise because his whole body was burning hot with his orgasm. He’d barely touched himself and his head was thrown back, eyes wide, shoulders tense.

It was the sensation of Remus shivering and clenching round him that did it for Sirius, really. And he lost sight of his rhythm as he pushed in fast and hard until he was cresting over the edge and spilling inside.

His arms gave out just as the first aftershock hit and he collapsed onto a puddle of wet and rapidly softening cock. His own slipped out quite by accident, and with fingers that were barely working he managed to slip the condom off, tie it at the end, and drop it into the bin.

“Oh this is…sticky,” Remus said. He reached onto his bedtable and pulled a few tissues from the box. It wasn’t great. Bits of paper stuck to them making it look like Sirius’ face the first time he tried to shave, and he couldn’t help his full-body laugh.

“Oh. Oh it looks so ridiculous. You’ve got bits of tissue all over your cock.”

Remus reached down with gentle fingers, then giggled along with Sirius’ burying his head in the soft expanse of black hair feathered along his pillow. “Yes well, you love it. And you love me, anyway.”

“Fuck me, but yeah. I do.”

*** 

An hour later found them cleaned up. They had a shower, exchanged blow jobs which ended in slightly less mess because they had been very spent before, and they never did get back round to reading. Sirius sat on the bed and tapped something onto his mobile.

A few seconds later a mechanical voice read out, ‘I love your stupid face, Moonpie.’

Remus flushed and hit Sirius with his elbow. “I’m right here you stupid git.”

“Yes well, it should be declared in tinny robot voices as well as my own.” Sirius yanked Remus down, kissing his cheek and Remus’ eyes went all squinty until he heard a shutter sound.

“Photo?”

“We needed a kissing selfie.” Sirius was hesitant for a second. “Would it be okay if…I mean if I were to say…post this on Tumblr? Under a selfie tag?”

Sirius was all tense and stiff because he expected Remus to tell him to fuck off with that idea. Tumblr was his anonymous place to hide, just like it was for Sirius in spite of a handful of vines he had with him and Prongs and Wormy.

But then Remus said all soft and breathy-like, “Yeah okay. We are a Tumblr Trash Romance novel after all. Aren’t we?”

“Oh god. The worst sort.”

Remus smiled and snuffled along Sirius’ neck before kissing him. Then he pulled out his laptop and found the post and reblogged it, tagging it for his selfie and adding the caption, “Tumblr Trash Romance Novel: How a Padfoot Woo’d a Moony.”

“We are disgusting,” Sirius said. “Like so disgusting. Like I want to vomit all over your computer.” He eyed the selfie with Remus’ unbidden and happy smile, and his shut eyes and lips puckered all over Remus’ cheek. “God, I can’t stand it. We need to break up right now immediately because I can’t survive this.”

“I always knew I was fatal,” Remus said from behind a sigh. He pulled Sirius down. “Sorry, love. But there’s no cure. You’re stuck forever.”

“My moon and stars,” Sirius said, and kissed him hard. “I guess I can live with it.”

“Don’t have much choice.”


End file.
